"First comes the love, then comes the...whaa..??"

Ah, don't we all remember the little childhood rhyme? Though, looking back, not much "childish" about it, ha! But from a very young age, it seems we are taught that there is a certain order and structure to life that is meant to be followed. In some aspects, yes, I do agree. But in this newlywed  phase of life, when it seems like everyone around me is popping out the little ones, all the singles are getting engaged, all the marrieds are celebrating life milestones, I think know that the main thing the Lord is trying to teach me is to sloooowww dooowwwwnnnn....

Did you happen to read through all that crossed out stuff? If you didn't, don't worry you didn't miss out on anything except IRONY. (Which means you need to go back and read it. Now.) In case you did read it and the irony is lost on you, let me explain. I started this post (yes, that exact above paragraph) on June 18th of this year. I never finished it because I didn't know how to finish it, and also for one other reason. Less than one month later, on July 16th to be specific, I found out I was pregnant. I am sitting here laughing to myself and shaking my head (lol-ing and smh-ing?) even as I type that out because it is so...yes, I shall say it again...ironic!! I mean goooo figure.

In some ways I think writing out that pre-pregnancy post was me trying to prove to myself that I really was coming to accept the fact that I don't need to do things in the same timing as others. And that really is true. I don't. God has a timing specific to everyone's individual life, so why try to walk in someone else's shoes? So why am I pregnant, you ask? Well, fact is, birth control only works if you take it when you're supposed to. So there ya go.

(Sidenote: we always knew this would happen. Don't know how we knew, but we just did. Maybe God was preparing us? Or maybe it was just the simple fact that expecting me to remember to take a pill every day at the same time every day was absolutely laughable. Don't know that we'll be trying that again! That's a whole 'nother conversation though...)

So here I am, nearly a month later and now I have to deal with all these emotions I'm having.

Yay! I'm having a baby! You're only pregnant because you wanted to be like other people. I'm glad I'm pregnant! I wouldn't be if God didn't want me to be! You are so unprepared for this. There goes the rest of your life. That's what you get for not having discipline with your pills. You don't even like birth control! Therefore you should've expected to get pregnant; therefore, you should be happy. 

And so on and so forth. I wish I could say that early on, most of my thoughts were positive and that I was just bubbling with excitement. I mean, there were times that I did feel that way, but the fact is, my emotions varied so far and wide that I wasn't sure what was at the core of what I truly felt.

And then came the morning sickness. O. M. G. Worst three months of my life. I mean, seriously. Talk about teetering into depression. I lost between 3-6 pounds during my first trimester, and I only recently got back to my pre-pregnancy weight. Words simply cannot express how absolutely miserable it was to spend the majority of the day leaning over a toilet or always needing a trashcan next to the couch or the bed or always having to keep a plastic bag (or two or three) in the car because I threw up whenever I drove (or was a passenger!) from pregnancy-induced motion sickness. I got the worst hot flashes, and come to find out, public stripping is unacceptable. Everything smelled disgusting. Everything tasted disgusting. Commercials with food looked disgusting. Everything Jeremiah made during that time was disgusting. Life sucked. Blah blah blah. My poor husband! Poor ME!! haha.

It's true. Whoever called it morning sickness must've been a man or some very, very, very lucky woman.

(Sidenote: Want the gory details?? Once I brushed my teeth after I threw up because I didn't like the gross feeling in my mouth. The taste of the toothpaste made me gag, and I threw up again. At least I was already in the bathroom. Yay for positive thinking...!!)

(Sidenote part 2: I do give God all praise though because the way things were ordered, I ended up submitting my two week notice for Things Remembered just a few days before we found out about the baby! The decision to leave was totally unrelated to the pregnancy (I wasn't experiencing morning sickness yet), yet in God's perfect plan. Cuz there's no way I would've survived that retail job and those crazy hours and all that stress with how I was feeling! So glory be to GOD!)

You're probably wondering why in the world I'm sharing all this. I'm actually wondering this myself. Well, I guess I wanted to finish the post I started all those months ago :-) But seriously, even as I'm writing I know this can come across as a bunch of complaints with no real solutions. I guess there are some things I want to clear up, both for myself and for others. For one, I know it's easy to try to keep up appearances. For those of you who read this and are friends with me on Facebook, I'm sure you'd have to agree that most of my statuses are happy and excited about having a little one on the way, and let me be clear, those posts are totally genuine. But getting to the point where I could share that happiness and it actually be how I truly feel....well, that's been a process.

When you really think about it, no one expects for you (me--Christ-follower, married woman) to be feeling anything but sheer joy at the announcement of a child. And even if there's the slightest inclination towards that, no one would expect for you to be broadcasting those mixed feelings to the world. I mean, how un-Christian-like is that!? (more transparency needed in the body, anyone?) Also, it's so easy to hear about the good stuff with pregnancy, all the oohs-and-ahhs and not the hard, uncomfortable, I-think-I'm-going-to-die-why-does-sex-have-to-lead-to-misery-and-BABIES moments. Well, here I am, broadcasting. Just me and my flaws...flaws and all? I hate Beyonce. Well, hate's a strong word lol. Dislike. Where was I? Oh yeah. Broadcasting. The Lord has seriously brought me (and the Husband too, actually) a LONG way since that fateful July day, and it would just be wrong to not give testimony to what HE's done!

So there ya go. This is the intro to me sharing the spiritual, emotional, and physical road I've been travelling since finding out about baby girl (who I love immensely!). It's a road I didn't want to be on at first, but that I'm so thankful and HAPPY to be on now.

How'd I get from those initial emotions to where I am now? Why did I have mixed emotions to begin with? How has being pregnant affected my relationship with both God and the Husband? Stay tuned for Part 2....

I Miss Blogging!

I've allowed myself to get "too busy" to blog, and I simply don't like it! I'll attempt to catch you guys up with all you missed during the end of January, the month of February, and the beginning of March!



This was me while I was sick. Except I'm not white.
 And I'm not blonde either. In case you didn't already know! ;)
Photo courtesy of Google Images

Well, I got super sick around the last week of January and lost at least ten pounds! Those of you who haven't ever seen me in person don't realize that means I weighed a whopping 93 pounds! It was quite scary; Much to my dismay, I could tell my clothes were bigger on me! I am QUITE thankful that I got over that little bug I had and have gained most of the weight back! I am trying to stay on top of taking better care of my body. Right now I'm attempting to do this by monitoring what I'm putting into my body (i.e., foods and vitamins) but I hope to soon get my bike out of storage and get back to riding it! Now there is an exercise I actually enjoy :)

Photo courtesy of Google Images

A few weeks prior to this happening, I got a new job! But it just so happens that I was sick during that first week I was supposed to start, so I ended up starting late. The Lord worked it all out though! So I've been at this job for a little over a month now; time sure does fly by!

Three main highlights of February: the 5th, the 14th, and the 18th! February 5th marked two years that the Favorite (also known as Jeremiah) and I have been "officially" courting/dating! We had a fantastically fun day spent enjoying an overcrowded IHOP, exploring a nearly deserted in-need-of-tearing-down mall, laughing and joking in a photography studio (maybe I'll post pictures at a later date!), and lots of talking in between! I so enjoyed that day ;)

When I got in the car, the Favorite had a
pretty pink rose on the seat!

We decided to celebrate Valentine's Day on that Friday the 18th instead of on Monday the 14th, and that was sooo fun! We both dressed up which is always fun (he look quite dashing, I might add, hehe)! He picked me up from work, and in the car I was met with an abundance of chocolates AND chocolate covered strawberries, YES! :) We went and picked up the pictures we had taken on the 5th, and also purchased 4 (yes, you read that right - f-o-u-r) purses! Before you get on my case, let me tell you the total price for those FOUR purses: less than 20 bucks! Oh, and they weren't all for me, f.y.i. :)


Chocolate covered strawberries from Godiva AND cakelove!

The Favorite hadn't told me where we were going for dinner in advance, but once we were almost there, he shared the name of the place and let. me. tell. you. I was THRILLED. It was a Brazilian steakhouse called Fogo de Chao in DC. Each of us was given a card--one side red, one side green. When the green side was facing up on the table, the servers constantly came to the table to give us different cuts of meat!! Our taste buds were on overload (in the best possible way), so after awhile we had to flip that card over to the red side to simply rest from eating! The environment was wonderful, and I loved the bathrooms (I have this thing for really nice bathrooms...don't ask. Actually, ask away if you so desire, hehe). We had so much fun there; I loved it. (And I would HIGHLY recommend it to any and everyone! ...assuming you aren't a vegetarian, hehe.) We closed out the night by going to a small jazz club called Twins Jazz. It was so relaxing to just sit, chat, and take in the live jazz being played. What an exciting, memorable night!

At Twins Jazz in DC. I love the red behind us! :) 

Another exciting thing about that Friday the 18th is that it was my spiritual birthday! I turned 10 years old in "spiritual years." I am so thankful for that sermon my pastor preached when I was in the sixth grade that opened my eyes to my need of grace and forgiveness from my Lord Jesus Christ. What a journey it has been since then! My prayer is that 10 years from now every single day will show more growth than the day before in my walk with the Lord.

Well, those are the highlights of my February!! It's so hard to believe we're almost halfway into MARCH! Time sure does fly by! I would love to hear if there have been any exciting updates or changes in you guys' lives in the past few weeks and month(s)!

The Sickies

Changing seasons....

As of this past weekend, winter officially turned to spring, and my body is totally confused. After experiencing several amazingly beautiful and glorious days of sunshine and warmth, torrential downpours (okay slight exaggeration!) came out of nowhere, bringing chilly winds and....a cold. Alas. Sinuses, coughing, the whole nine yards. So am I excited about spring? Most definitely! But am altogether thrilled with the havoc it's wreaked on my body this early in the season? Not at all. I'm not complaining though, really. I actually just wanted to share why I haven't been motivated to post for a bit, AND to share something new I'm going to start trying which I am entirely too excited about! And what is that something, you ask? Oh, let me tell you... :) Home remedies. 

How dare they make something so...so evil as the common cold into an adorable microbe plush toy??

Womp. I'm sure that's what some of you guys were thinking once you read the source of my excitement. But all haters aside, I really am looking forward to trying out the all-natural side of health and wellness. For me, it's so easy to pop a pill (or several pills!) to relieve a headache, pressure, cramps, cough, fever, whatever it may be. Medicines are definitely great for some health issues, but as I'm learning through my current research, somethings can be cured just as well (if not better!) through a natural means rather than a chemical one. I'm starting out with the basics:  vitamins. To be honest, I can't remember the last time I took a vitamin (which is sad, I know), but hey, I'm gonna get back on track! I googled the question of what a good vitamin for someone in my age range to take is, and came across this link from Oprah's website of what to look for in multivitamins and supplements if you're between the ages of 20 and 40. Useful tool! 

Who knows? I just may invest in one of these!

I think this is a great start to being a better steward of this physical body the Lord has given me! I'm still in the process of doing research and buying my all natural stuff from the store or wherever, but I shall let my readership know how my (hopefully lasting) new (and healthy!) habit goes!  :)