Birthday Money

This is about my birthday. And money. But not about birthday money.

I'm so thankful to the Lord for bringing me into another year of life!! I'm incredibly excited to see what the age 21 holds. I know God is going to do some big things in my life and the lives of others I know, and I'm just looking forward to seeing the turnout! I ate lunch with the Favorite, and then went and had an Oreo shake with the Hermanita at Potbelly's. On the way to the Metro I got into a conversation with a homeless guy named Marshall (who I now regret passing so many times in the past). He was such a nice guy, and so smart, and very interested in spiritual things as well as philosophy. I ended up buying two books from him, and I look forward to stopping and talking with him in the future! The Scripture about what I do for the poor being a reflection on my relationship with Christ kept coming to mind that day, and I could've ignored it, but praise be to God that His Spirit enabled me to follow His leading in talking to this man. God loves him no less! So important to remember. Definitely a birthday highlight. :)

Okay, so after that I went home, worked on the last of the fundraising for the day, and leave to mail out some donations. But when I get to the post office I realize I left the envelopes at home. Booooo. At this point I'm getting kinda frustrated, but it's all better when I meet my family at Wegmans. They surprised me with a mini-celebration which included a chocolate creme pie (YES!!), pizza, the surprise arrival of Mom's Friend and the Favorite, and the Hermanita and Bro-in-Law! Yayyy!! It was awesome. Good food, conversation, and gifts!! The Hermanita and Bro-in-Law bought me a brand spankin' new camera (which I've been without for a while) for my trip to Cape Town, along with 8 gigs of memory! Woot woot! Beautiful cards and sentiments were expressed as well. :) I love love love my siblings and my parents and the Favorite and the Bro-in-Law, even if I do say mean things and beat up on them every now and then ;-) I'm so thankful to God for a good day!

Now about that money. That's actually regarding all the donations needed for my missions trip to Cape Town in a little over a week! Friday (um, today) is when the full $6,000.00 is due! As of Sunday I only had $3,505, but I have seen God move in people's hearts big time this week, and have seen another $2,300 or so come in this week alone! Still praying that the last little bit will come in today, sealing me in for this trip! How exciting it is to see God work. It's been especially great to see people who aren't giving out of their abundance, but simply out of a heart to sow into the kingdom of God. Plus all these people who've been so supportive are partnering in the work God is doing in Cape Town, even though they aren't physically there! How amazing is that!?

Anyways, it's well past my bedtime, and I just wanted to do a short catch up since it's been a while since I've posted. Next time I post hopefully I'll have some pictures to post from my new camera, woohoo!!

When The Words Won't Come...

I'm sitting there and the thoughts are in my head but they just. won't. come. out.
I want verbalize them but every time I open up my mouth
out
comes a random statement about
the latest book I've read
or upcoming summer plans.
(Where is the fire?) I watch eyes light up about family, friends,
temporal stuff that has no bearing on the life to come.
I think,
I think,
I think,
but I speak not a word.
Finally His name slips out my lips. Once. Twice.
(Wince.)
Why? His name has that much power!
I know it as I say it,
and they know it as they hear it,
and yet I don't. say. more.
Mind drifts away from the conversation to scriptures read just that morning:
For I am not ashamed... living sacrifice... count as loss... 
deny oneself...
power of God unto salvation...
(So is to not speak of salvation me having the power to sentence others to death?)
Here I sit.
I embrace the truth of the gospel wholeheartedly and selfishly hoard it.
I fatten my spirit and harden my heart and I just. don't. share.
(or care? Because if I don't share I must not care...enough.)
And when someone later asks me how the day went I pause.
Because it certainly didn't go as planned.
My plan was to share. To give. To lose
this excess weight gained in the gluttony of spiritual things,
to exercise this faith
I claim to have.
My plan.
Didn't happen.
Why?
ME.
Me. Me. Me. Me. Me. It was my plan, into which I inserted
the One who has the power to save.
Even the best intentions of sharing the gospel can go awry
when not done under the Spirit's leading.
I wonder how to clean up this mishap then remember:
I don't. I pray. I let go. I hope.
How am I to grow without failing? I learn most often by my mistakes.
Me: weak. Him: strong.
(Surely no chances again soon though.)
But yes. Next day, new person.
(Really God!?)
I open my mouth to speak, then shut it.
Your words,
not mine.
This time.
His Spirit flows,
my mouth opens,
His words speak.
Under the direction of my Master
I am a willing slave 
to the truth that frees.
Having no idea how the situation will turn out
I still choose to surrender myself to His working through me.
For even in the midst of my failures and weaknesses,
in His sovereignty He (still) provides an opportunity
for me to honor Him.

BlogLight!

Welcome to the first edition of "BlogLight!," a post in which I will highlight certain blogs of friends or people I've found online who I enjoy. I'm not sure yet how frequently I will do my "bloglights," but be on the look out for more in the future!

The first blog I would like to highlight is Soul in Bloom, created by Alisha, a friend of mine. Alisha was the one who initially inspired me to go through with the process of creating My Life: Perpetua. She (and a couple other friends) brainstormed names with me (though they were no where close to what I currently have!), and she pretty much "showed me the ropes," so to speak. Both new bloggers, we've had the opportunity to encourage each other in writing (especially when we don't feel like it hehe) and also share with each other different blogs that we enjoy! 

My favorite post at Soul in Bloom is entitled "Will Your Vision Matter?" The reason I love this post is because there is something so beautiful about being transparent about what the Lord is doing in our lives! It's so evident that God wants Alisha to step out of her comfort zone into "His Zone," where He takes complete control, working things out in her life that go exceedingly and abundantly above anything she could ask or think! (Eph.3.20-21) God desires this of all of us though! This statement by Alisha sums it up well: 

My challenge for others, as you think about your own vision for God, is to step out of your comfort zone, whatever that may be. Don’t just “work on” the easy things, but let God truly grow you. As a quote that I love goes, “Our greatest fear should not be of failure, but of succeeding at something that doesn’t really matter.” Will your vision matter?

Are there any desires God has placed into your life that have not yet been acted upon out of fear of knowing how it will all turn out? I encourage you to take a step of faith, trusting that God really does know what He's doing, then see the incredible results of taking Him at His Word! 

Don't forget to check out Soul in Bloom, and I would love to hear how God is working in your life individually even know, so do share! Have a great week!! :)